Posts Tagged ‘Saddleback’

Saddleback One Card!

December 22, 2008

Usher: Hey Deak, did you get your new Saddleback One Card?

Deacon: What on earth are you talking about?

Usher: It’s a new promotion by Warren’s church.  You can now get points based on how much you tithe, how many sermons you buy from their store and for regular attendance!

Deacon: You can’t be serious.  What on earth would you use points in church for?

Usher: Are you kidding me Deak?  I can get free schmultsy Christian CDs based on how much tithe I give.  No one will ever know.  I just swipe my card at those cool ATM (automatic tithing machines) in the foyer and it’ll secretly record my points and send me a statement.  Grand prize is box seats right up front so I can see Rick and his team, possibly get his autograph and if I can accrue 10,000 bonus points, I can have lunch with him!

Deacon: You’ve got to be off your perch there Usher.

Usher:  I’m opting for a picture of Rick on my card, during his invocation with Barack Obama…..I fell blessed.

Here’s where your tithe funds the new “church franchise”!

August 17, 2008

Usher: Hey Deak, the North Point megachurch has figured the marketing out.  Even one of their “lieutenants” shamelessly admits it on a blog.  They’re buildilng video venues and charging 250K to other churches.  Some of the new convert churches are even leaving traditional denominations.  Now that’s an interesting way of stealing christians!

Deacon: Who needs a business plan and investors.  Just open up a video church and fund your face all over the world.  Warren publishes his in books, sells sermons and then has presidential debates at his church to get himself even more exposure.  Very Oprahesque if you ask me.  And how does he get all those people to come and worship in front of a screen?

Usher: Maybe he’s selling options on the side.  I smell a new network and ad dollars.  Maybe even a listing for Wall Street! 

The Chick-fil-A Church

How “video venues” are helping megachurches franchise.