Posts Tagged ‘increase’

Faith in the Increase – Not an Increase in Faith

January 28, 2009

Usher:  Deak, those humans really got it easy.

Deacon: How’s that Usher – what’s buggin’ you now?

Usher: Well, they have American Express, Citibank, Capital One and Fannie Mae

Deacon: So, it’s they way they go about their lives – it’s all based on credit.

Usher: How come we don’t have a Roadkill Express or a Fowler’s Blanche?  We could go to the roadkill store and just buy our roadkill instead of having to scout and fly, scout and fly.  Life would be so much more predictable!

Deacon: Usher, if you did that – you’d forget where the roadkill really comes from , now wouldn’t you?

Deacon & Usher T-Shirts #3

July 30, 2008

Usher: Hey Deak, there were some interesting comments on the blog today.  One sweet lady accused us of being “cynical” regarding the mission trip post. 

Deacon: Aren’t you?

Usher: Well, kinda.  But the truth is the truth.  Who’s the trip for anyway? 

The Church Must Go On!

The Church Must Go On!

Who Benefits?

Who Benefits?

 

Church Goer's Anonymous

Church Goer's Anonymous

Increase Your Giving!

May 15, 2008

Deacon:  Hey Usher – you hear the sermon on Sunday?

Usher:  Yeah Deak = Something about increasing your giving instead of your living..

Deacon: Did you tithe off your roadkill on the Pike?

Usher:  Come on Deak – It was only a field mouse!

Deacon:  Hey, you know the scriptures…

Usher:  But I only got two bites from that mouse!  An Audi flattened it before I got a third!

Deacon:  10% dude – it’s scriptural

Usher:  So Deak – what’s 10% of two bites?